For every girl
who wondered if she should love him or dump him.....
For every girl
who listened to her heart instead of her friends advice....
For every girl
who l wondered if she was wasting her time dating that guy....
She had gotten
used to dating the commitment-phobic Marc, thirteen years her senior. They had
a great relationship--why rush into things? She saw no need to pressure him for
marriage, believing that when the time was right, he would propose. But after
they had been together for four years, their friends decided to take matters
into their own hands, pushing Marc to propose and making Hilary realize how
much she really did want to marry the man that she loved. Unfortunately, Marc
still wasn't ready--and their friends' meddling in the form of a faux
engagement party led to a disastrous New Year's Eve that brought their
relationship to an inevitable turning point.
We meandered to the
backyard, which was on the inter-coastal, champagne flutes in our hands.
Although I knew it was a joke, I couldn’t help it. I kept admiring the ring on
my finger, pretending it was really my engagement ring. I expected Eric or Jaye
to fess up and admit to Eric’s family that our engagement was a joke, but they
didn’t. They just kept letting Eric’s family think we were really engaged. Lois
kept on beaming, tossing out questions about our engagement. She wanted
details. Jaye ended up answering almost all of them for me. After all, if not
for Jaye, this “engagement” would not be happening.
“So… when did this
happen?” Lois asked.
“Tonight, Mom,” Jaye
answered quickly. “Would you believe it happened right before we came over?”
“Really? Wow. Were you
expecting it, Hilary?”
“No,” I honestly replied.
“It came out of left field.”
“Oh, I love a surprise
engagement,” Lois beamed.
“Yeah, it was a surprise
all right. Hilary wasn’t the only one that was caught off guard,” Jaye
clarified as I tried to keep a straight face.
“How did Marc propose?
Did he get down on one knee? Irvin didn’t, and I was so disappointed.”
“Don’t feel bad, Mom,
Marc didn’t get down on one knee either. But I think he did get weak in the
knees.” Jaye added, “But you asked how he proposed. Let’s just say… I don’t
think he planned for it.”
Lois smiled and took a
delicate sip of her drink. I still had a stupid smile plastered on my face. I
was having a blast. Well, I was until I glanced over and saw the pained look in
Marc’s eyes, which was growing more noticeable with every additional comment
out of Jaye’s mouth.
was trying so hard to be a good sport. I could see it was getting increasingly
difficult for him to let this charade continue. As he got agitated, so did I.
In an instant, the joke stopped being funny. It was sad and hurtful. No matter
how hard I pretended, Jaye’s proposal wasn’t real, nor was it going to
magically become so. Instead, it started to become crystal clear to me, while
looking at Marc’s troubled face, that he had no intention of proposing to me
now—or, I feared, ever. Would I be okay always just being his girlfriend?
It’s amazing how
devastating disappointment can be, especially when it’s over something that you
didn’t really expect to occur in the first place, if you are truly honest with
Grossman dated a guy so commitment-phobic that she was able to write a book
about their relationship. She is currently the CFO of a beverage alcohol
importer and lives on Long Island.
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